Lather, Rinse, Repeat

I start my new job tomorrow, which is a good thing for a number of reasons.  First and foremost is that we need my income: it takes money to live and we cannot do that on my wife’s salary alone.  Next is getting back into a routine: five months at home has really worn away […]

My Two Minutes of Fame

So that thing I did – where I was interviewed for a news piece about the LIRR gendered ticket policy?  The piece is up and can be found on the WFUV website, linked here: SHOULD THE MTA GET RID OF GENDERED PASSES? I originally asked that ‘they’ be used as my prefered pronoun, but the […]

She’s Back…

My poor sad neglected blog…  I have had such good intentions – so many things I have wanted to say…  But I cannot seem to be motivated to write them up.   I am hoping that this entry will be the reboot – my opportunity to start over…  Time will tell. So what has happened […]

Casa del Whopper

After my uncomfortable shopping excursion to get a sport coat, I stopped at the Burger King down the road to pick up a nutritious balanced meal for lunch.  One would think shopping at the ‘big and tall’ shop should have prompted me to find something healthier. 😦  I wait on line – get up to […]


Originally posted on Genderweird:
This past week I had a phone interview with a Washington Post reporter, off the record, about being non-binary in a binary world.  It went exceedingly well, but that’s not the point of this post.  What I’ve been mulling over for a while now is — wait for it — my…

Sometimes I’m a Bit Slow

I was Googling my blog name when I came across this: It seems that Kate Bornstein tweeted a link to my blog page about being genderqueer… And I find it two years later. Like I said, I’m a bit slow at times.  But still… How absolutely f’ing cool is that! 😀

Do you hear that, Mr. Anderson?

That is the sound of – inevitability… For some thirty-five years I have lived conscious of the fact that I am not that which I have been told I am. With the never-ending ‘noise in my head’, I have lived in opposition to what I can only describe as an ‘instinctual knowledge’ of what I […]


I have tinnitus.  You know, that ‘ringing’ sound some people have in their ears.  I have had it as long as I can remember, although I am sure that there was some time in my life where I didn’t.  For the most part, it’s not a problem as the normal ambient sounds of every day […]

The Truth of the Matter

A member of an online forum I frequent made the following observation… It isn’t so much a question of essential natures being rigidly dichotomous (they aren’t), as of there being a convenient typology we want to use, and perhaps most of us need. …part of a larger discussion that prompted my following reply.

Girl Talk Redux

I’m standing on the subway platform, waiting for the E train – my iPod blasting Pendulum – when I notice a woman talking to me. I turn to her and pull one of the earphones out. Still unable to hear, I remove the other and put my iPod in my bag. “Your eyebrows look great” she […]

Girl Talk

For several months now, I have been going every few weeks to get a Shellac manicure at a salon by my home. It’s a pretty typical place doing hair, waxing, nails, etc. and I have become a regular customer there which is a nice feeling. I sit down and Dana (the nail tech) commences to […]

What would you like to be today?

It’s December first and that means a new monthly train ticket and a new opportunity for the conductor to play “Guess my gender” wherein they decide whether to punch my ticket as either male or female. I have discussed this here in the past – how I have been read as a man or (more […]

Remembrance of Things Past

Friday morning, second week of January 2010 : I’m in the cafeteria when I see her. She is in her early twenties, jaw-length bob, perfect makeup, wearing a bright blue cowl neck sweater, leather skirt coming down just above her knee, a wide black belt, dark tights and classy heals. I can hear her as […]

I’ve done what???

“So you transitioned on the job?”  That was the question I was asked by one of the transgender panelists after the meeting the other night. I wrote about this about three years ago.  I have a rather narrow definition of transition as it applies to transgender people.  It is a definition, really, of transsexual transition […]

Perhaps the needle has moved a bit

So I went to panel discussion I mentioned in my last post.  It went pretty much as I expected: two transition stories and a discussion of the hosting firm’s policies.  There was talk of ‘transition teams’ and the all important ‘bathroom concerns’.  (Yes, using a bathroom is important – but I have never seen the […]

Plus ça change, plus c’est la même chose…

plus ça change, plus c’est la même chose There is a panel discussion coming up on gender identity and expression in the workplace.  It is being hosted by a large investment bank and should be interesting.  I was asked if I had any suggestions for the panel and offered to tell my tale it they […]

The Cost of Doing Business

n.b.: I first wrote this in October of 2008 and it’s been kicking around my drive since then. Six months later, things are only marginally different. The anxiety I felt then is still there – I am simply learning to live with it. It was never my plan – this thing I do at work: […]

Wanting what I have

My wife and I don’t talk. Not that we’re silent around one another, but we don’t talk about important things – things which when left unsaid only serve to widen the gap between us. We don’t talk about sex – who’s satisfied, who’s not. We don’t talk about my transness – at least not seriously. […]

No beach to walk on

There are many things about which I do not allow myself the luxury of contemplation. I keep these things tucked away in the back of my thoughts, covered with whatever I can find in the hopes that they will remain forever hidden from me. I do this because to consider these things – to bring […]

Conductor Confusion

I have posted about my adventures Riding the Long Island Railroad – wherein each month I get to see what gender the conductor thinks I am. So far this year, my ticket has been punched as female every month except July: it’s ok, it happens. 😉

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